nightswimming, remembering that night.

remember when, in the dead of winter, we decided to go to the beach, and despite it being quite frigid and windy and foggy and really really really cold, we ran out into the ocean like almost fully clothed and it was amazing even though we were numb and blue and the rain stung like ice and we couldn't feel our toes and the sand hurt to run on as we shivered our way back to the restrooms to sit under the hot-air-blowers for the next half hour? yeah, that was chill. and then, a few days later, there was california, and the ocean's just as cold down there, except of course it's warmer outside and also they have these convenient coin-operated hot showers that are like heavenly... i enjoyed that immensely. and then it was back to hawaii where there's no such thing as cold except for in over-air-conditioned classrooms that are completely unnecessary and the refrigerated sections of grocery stores. you could lie out in the middle of the ocean in the middle of the night and look up at the stars and float there, bobbing up and down like a duck in the waves. i don't know where i'm going with this, but it was all pretty chill. (ha, i just realized i made a pun.)

but anyway, it's gotten really cold here, and i notice it most when i'm waiting at bus stops. my nose gets cold first and then my fingers. i am in search of a nice warm hat, but haven't found the perfect one yet. my room is like ten degrees warmer than the rest of the house because the heater is in my closet. it's like a sauna in here, but i don't mind too much.

did you know that when you smile, you actually make yourself happier, if even just the tiniest bit?

life does not suck. and you are not blah. love love love.